My literary genetics

Posted by Jessica Jewett 2 Comments »

I think it’s interesting how sometimes there are certain talents or interests that can run in families. I come from quite strong creative energies on both sides of my family. My mother’s side is both literary and artistic while my father’s side is quite artistic and musical. My brother and I came out with a smattering of talents from both sides of our genetics. I may talk about our artistic genetics in a future blog but for right now, I’m going to talk about our literary genetics.

The Great Unpublished Writer

Nellie Newell (nee Rulon), pictured at left, was my great-great grandmother. She was my mother’s mother’s mother’s mother if that makes better sense. Born in 1870 in Monmouth, Illinois, she is a bit of a legend in my family for being tough but maternal and a woman with unfulfilled passions for the written word. When she was a baby, her parents took a steamer on the Mississippi and she was kidnapped by a fellow passenger. The captain announced that nobody would be allowed to disembark until she was safely returned to her family, and a few hours later, baby Nellie was found on the deck by herself. Nellie was raised in a home filled with music and creativity, in a family in which women were taught to think and act for themselves, yet still remain feminine and dedicated to family. Her mother, Jennie Rulon (nee Ross), wrote poetry sometimes and played the piano and sang, but little Nellie was the one who showed real literary talent. Nellie also played the piano, organ and guitar.

My great-great grandfather, Benjamin, married her in 1890 and their marriage was quite modern for the times in that he supported her interests outside of raising children. She continued to write through her marriage after they set up their new family in Denver, Colorado (now you see how I was born in Denver). For the most part, she was drawn to poetry and songwriting, probably due to the influence of her mother. Later in life, Nellie wrote a song called “Beautiful Colorado” and her son-in-law, Bob Galbreath, was a patent attorney and had a copyright drawn up. The song came back with a letter attached that said because the song was written by a woman, it would never be published. Nellie was heartbroken, as it took months for her to compose the song, and she tossed it into the kitchen fire. Her dreams of being published went up the chimney with that song and she never saw her own work in print.

I grew up hearing this story throughout my life and when I began publishing my own poetry, I decided to fulfill Nellie’s dream for her by including her poetry in my book. You can see it for yourself by checking out the title Mist of the Mountains at http://www.jessicajewettonline.com/books

The Great Published Writer

You may know my cousin better than you would my grandmother. I’m related to Sarah Orne Jewett through my mother’s father, who was a Jewett. Sarah was born in 1849 and was much more successful with her literary career. Her father was a doctor, which is still a career tradition in the family, and Sarah accompanied him on house calls throughout her childhood. That introduced her to many of the people and places in coastal Maine that would later heavily influence her literary development. Sarah’s first important published work was at the age of 19 in the Atlantic Monthly, which was a popular magazine at the time. She continued steadily publishing short stories and novels for the rest of her life, including A White Heron, A Country Doctor, and The Country of the Pointed Firs. She counted most American literary figures of the 19th century as her friends, such as Willa Cather, Mary Ellen Chase, William Dean Howells, Henry James, Rudyard Kipling, Harriet Beecher Stowe, Alfred Tennyson, Oliver Wendell Holmes, Mark Twain, Sarah Wyman Whitman, Henry Wadsworth Longfellow, Nathaniel Hawthorne, Lydia Maria Child, Charles Dudley Warner and John Greenleaf Whittier, as well as Edwin Booth, brother of John Wilkes Booth. In 1901, she was given an honorary degree from Bowdoin College, an institution that would not even admit female students until well into the 20th century.

Although Sarah always came home to Maine, she also lived in Boston for different periods. She never married and there has been some speculation about her sexuality in modern times. The speculation comes from living with her best friend, Annie Fields, in what was known as “a Boston marriage” for most of her adult life. Boston marriages were the polite way to describe likely lesbian relationships at that time. There is no real concrete evidence either way but it was always accepted among my part of the Jewett family that Annie was basically her wife. Both women were rather forward thinking, favored “women’s emancipation”, and they were also quite philanthropic. Their relationship’s particulars are not so important as the work they did together in their lives. Annie was a source of inspiration and encouragement for Sarah, who might not have worked so hard at perfecting her craft without that influence.

Like my grandmother Nellie, I also grew up with stories from Sarah’s life. Her books were always in our house, although I never read them, and I was constantly reminded that I was “going to turn out just like Sarah.” The comparisons ran deep enough that as I plumped up in puberty, my grandmother started telling me how much I look like Sarah, which I always took as the highest compliment. Sarah’s influence has hung over my literary life so much that she was a big reason why I chose to publish under the name Jewett instead of Jones.

I suspect that as a dig more into the detailed lives of my family, I will find more writers. For now, it’s enough that I come from such strong women who had the courage to live by the courage of their convictions.

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Bad things, good people

Posted by Jessica Jewett 9 Comments »

This is a question I have been asking myself a lot lately.  Why do bad things happen to good people?

As someone who serves in an unofficial capacity as a spiritual advisor, I’m supposed to have these answers.  To tell you the truth, I don’t have these answers completely.  Nobody does.  That’s the bottom line with anything concerning the nature of the universe, the spirit and why things are the way they are – none of us are truly going to know the truth until we leave these bodies.  That doesn’t mean we don’t have some ideas as to why such things happen.  I’ve spent a lot of time considering the implications of seemingly good people being assaulted with bad things in their lives mostly due to the fact that I was born a quadriplegic.  People born with these kinds of things tend to ask, “Why?” all the time.

Sometimes I see people talk about how they must have done some really bad things in past lives and that’s why bad things are happening to them now, as if they have to repay some kind of karmic debt.  I don’t necessarily see karma in those black and white terms.  Bear with me on this because I don’t always have a clear way to explain it, but to me, it goes something like this.  Being punished for doing bad things is not typically a direct impact from the universal life force, God, whatever you want to call it.  Punishment, much more often than not, is self-inflicted.  It’s not so much, “I did this bad thing in a past life, so now I have to be punished for it in this life,” as it is, “I did this bad thing in a past life, so now I have to learn why it was bad and I’m going to walk a similar path to teach myself not to repeat those mistakes.”

It is my personal belief that the universe and the way we interact with the universe is much more in our own control than it is something inflicted on us.  Yes, there are checks and balances in the universe.  There are elements in the universe that push us in this or that direction, but for the most part, fate or destiny or whatever you want to call it is largely in our own hands.  That’s the great test of life.  I do believe that the big obstacles and challenges are usually preplanned before we were born into this lifetime or even preplanned several lifetimes ago, but the real test is in how we react to those obstacles and challenges.  Sometimes there are clear right and wrong choices.  Sometimes there’s a little bit more of a gray area and neither choice is completely right nor completely wrong, but each choice will take you into a different life path.  Obstacles like diseases, disabilities, identity issues, sexuality issues, self-worth problems, financial challenges, interpersonal relationship problems, and so on and so forth, are all possibilities that can be preplanned, but how you react to those things will determine the success or failure or indifference of a lifetime.

Sometimes the take charge attitude of “I’m in control of my own destiny” can be taken too far, however.  I don’t believe it should override any personal religious or spiritual system.  The ideas of being proactive in your own destiny and having faith in a higher power can and do coexist for a lot of people.  If you use the similarity of a parent/child relationship, a person will look to the parent for guidance, love, support, and so forth, but still maintain individuality as well.  A domineering parent/child relationship of “do as I say and it doesn’t matter why” is never healthy, nor is it healthy to blindly follow any particular spiritual path that demands total compliance without your own individuality.

I went through many, many years of being angry with Christianity and Catholicism to the point of completely turning my back on those faiths because I felt it was a domineering parent/child relationship.  In many ways, I became agnostic.  I really didn’t know what I believed for a long time.  I drifted from one religious inclination to another and even questioned the existence of anything spiritual altogether.  The anger came from a place of, “Why are these bad things happening to me?”  My father left me when I was little girl.  I’m a survivor of sexual molestation.  I had an abusive long term relationship.  I miscarried a child.  And as if any of that wasn’t enough to make me question what I did before that was so bad to make me deserve everything bad now, I had to go through all of these things while being a quadriplegic and an intuitive on top of it.  I considered myself a freak enough for being a quadriplegic.  Apparently, according to the bullies in school, being an intuitive was much more freakish and deserving of name-calling and abuse.  As things piled on top of each other, I really didn’t see a point in my existence, to be quite honest, and I developed a drinking problem as well as a dependency on prescription painkillers.  None of this is secret.  I have been quite open about my struggles of my life if only to help other people overcome their own struggles.  I wasn’t always in such a position to want to help other people but I am now.

So why did all of those bad things happen to me?

In my case, the answer is quite simple.  All of those things happened to me in order to force me to recognize who I am, where I’m going, and to learn what it means to have a take no prisoners attitude in life.  If I don’t go through struggles like that, I don’t develop ambition.  I don’t develop coping skills.  I don’t develop a need to kick ass first and take names later.  Everything I have endured, although nearly impossible to overcome at the time, has made me who I am today.

So when people come to me asking why bad things happen to them, I usually turn the tables.  I want people to think about how, yes, these are terrible things happening to you, but what are you going to do change it?  What are you going to do to learn from it?  People who get buried in their own depression and hopelessness usually have unnatural defeatist attitude that they don’t even recognize.  It’s impossible to see things objectively from within the black hole of depression and hopelessness.  Life is hard and bad things happen.  The idea that they’re happening to you because you’ve done something bad before doesn’t really change the fact that it’s still happening now.  So bad things are happening to you.  What can you do with those bad things to teach yourself survival skills?  What can you do to teach other people survival skills?  How can you evolve your negative momentum into positive momentum?

You are very much in charge of your own destiny at this very moment.

Sometimes I give people this exercise.  Think of a problem in your life.  Now get a piece of paper and a pen, and write down three steps you can take to resolve that problem.  No matter what the steps are, do something every day that will push you toward accomplishing one of those steps.  Eventually, before you know it, you will have resolved that problem plaguing you and it will have taught you so much about yourself and the world around you.  It’s about being proactive in your own life.  Don’t focus on the bad things happening to you.  Focus on what you are going to do to those bad things.

For me personally, I am very much plagued right now by a disease affecting a few friends of mine.  Someone I love very much is suffering a great deal.  Someone else I love very much is going to experimental medical treatments barely a year after getting married.  These are not things I can fix.  I want to because that’s what I do — I fix everything hurting people I love — but I can’t stop this.  The helplessness that comes with knowing people I love are suffering and don’t deserve it creates a level of depression I haven’t experienced in a long time.  Oddly enough, I found myself turning to something higher for comfort.  The religious faith of one person in particular, despite the suffering, has inspired me to seek comfort in prayer again.  Prayer, truthfully, is just another form of meditation but I have begun doing it again.  I went through a lot of anger for many years toward Christianity and Catholicism because of how I was treated by the churches for being a medium. My anger has cooled and I’ve learned to separate God from what the modern churches are now. I don’t identify as any particular religion though. God and I are learning to get along again. I consider God to be one of many, so that might make me pagan. I think I’m a little bit of everything. I have been told by those in the know that I fit into the Spiritism category (not Spiritualism – they are different). I’m a “let it be” kind of girl, to borrow from Paul McCartney.

Perhaps the suffering of people I love are planting seeds of lessons about faith.  Faith in ritual, faith in humanity, faith in love, and faith in the idea that not everything is about crime and punishment, but teaching and truth.

What are you learning from your obstacles, challenges and suffering? What are you learning from the obstacles, challenges and suffering of others?

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Disabilities and Psychic Abilities

Posted by Jessica Jewett 6 Comments »

A lot of people keep asking me about my theories concerning the connection between disabilities and psychic abilities.  I have talked about it at length in different places but never in a concentrated place like my blog where I can direct people when they ask me about it.  So here I am to explain it!  I don’t think this blog will be very long because it’s pretty straightforward but here we go….

My beliefs on this matter are very simple.  I believe that there is a connection between displaying natural psychic abilities and having some kind of disability whether it is physical or developmental.  (As an aside, the proper terms are physical disability and developmental disability.  Saying crippled or retarded are not at all acceptable.)  I started noticing the connection when I was rather young in school.  When I realized what it meant to be someone with psychic/intuitive/mediumistic abilities, I was somewhere around middle school, I think, and I was automatically put into special ed classes for one period a day just by virtue of being in a wheelchair.  Mainstreaming people with disabilities in school permanently is a whole other issue that I will probably talk about it another blog at some point.  But anyway, some of the other kids in the special ed classes sometimes talked about sensing presences that they couldn’t see or hearing mysterious sounds or knowing information before it happened.  Basic intuitive abilities, really.  Outside of the special ed classes, the other kids almost never talk about those things.  In fact, outside of the special ed classes, talking openly about intuitive abilities was almost always met with ridicule and bullying.  I made the mistake when I was very young of telling a few friends about the things I saw or experienced and it resulted in bullying that made me silent about it until I was well into high school almost ready to graduate.

I never gave it much thought, the question of why people with disabilities of any type were more prone to having spiritual experiences than “normal” people.  I don’t like the term normal because it implies that people like me are abnormal and I don’t think that’s right but there is no other way to compare and contrast people with disabilities and not with disabilities right now.  My mother made a friend with a professional psychic when I was in my sophomore year of high school and that woman made the suggestion to me that people with disabilities are actually very advanced souls and it’s natural to make the connection that advanced souls would be more connected to the other side.  She used people with Down Syndrome as her example, specifically naming them as being very advanced souls.  She also indicated that such people are on their last lives and will not reincarnate anymore because they have finished everything they need to learn and they’ve used their last life to teach people around them.  That was my first exposure to a theory about why people with disabilities are naturally more connected to spirituality than others.  Specifically in the areas of developmental disabilities, I have noticed that people with various forms of autism tend to displaying natural mediumistic abilities.  Several friends of mine who have children with autism also report their children having significant and legitimate encounters with spirit entities and displaying precognitive knowledge.

In my case, I don’t have any developmental disabilities whatsoever but I am technically a quadriplegic so that makes me fall into the physical disability category.  That gets a little hairier as far as fitting into the theory of why disabilities and spiritual abilities seem to be so connected.  When I was writing my book about reincarnation, I really had to address that issue because I knew other people were going to ask me about it.  That meant I had to ask a lot of very difficult questions, which is what should happen when anyone is writing a book about spirituality in any form.  It actually occurred to me when I was watching that movie Ray about Ray Charles, who was blind.  I don’t remember the exact scene or anything but the the actor playing Ray referenced the fact that because he was blind, the rest of his senses were heightened.  He was talking to a woman and told her that there was a hummingbird outside or something of that nature and she looked and found the hummingbird even though she hadn’t noticed it.  He noticed it because he could hear it.  His other senses were extremely heightened because one of his senses didn’t work properly anymore.

Most people probably don’t even realize it when they look at people with physical disabilities but we are extremely confined and many of us have some senses denied that other people take for granted.  Some of us don’t have a sense of touch at all (I do have full sensation).  Some of us are very limited in our mobility, which means we can’t just get up and go into the next room when we hear people talking.  It doesn’t matter what sense is taken away.  The other senses are going to go into overdrive to make up for the loss.  It’s not anything that happens because we intended to – it’s just the body’s natural way of coping and surviving.  Since I was very limited in where I could go and what I could do when I was younger before I had a wheelchair, I got very good at listening to everything going on around me, even in other parts of the house.  I knew where everybody was in the house, and I knew what they were doing, and most of the time, I knew about every conversation that happened under my roof even if I didn’t witness it firsthand.  Being so limited and mobility forces a person to be still and quiet much more in their lives than the average person.  That’s usually the first lesson in developing psychic abilities – be still, listen, etc.  It’s the beginning of meditation.  So people like me who are not as physically active as everyone else naturally developed the beginning stages of meditation without realizing what it was.  And as the other senses became heightened, so did extrasensory perception.  It happened for me at an extremely young age.  I started having experiences with the other side and spirit entities when I was a toddler even though I didn’t understand the terms “afterlife” or “ghost”.

In the simplest terms possible, it just comes down to being denied one or more senses and the other senses jump into overdrive to make up for the loss.  People don’t typically think of psychic abilities as another sense.  The tend to put it on a pedestal like it’s special, so special that only a few people actually have it.  I kind of disagree with that.  I think it’s just something everybody has but most people ignore and never develop.  Extrasensory ability is no different than a sense of touch or sense of smell or sense of sight.

For those of you who regularly watched Paranormal State, they often did experiments with sensory deprivation in order to open themselves up to encounters with entities.  It’s basically the same principle.  If you deny yourself certain senses, the rest of them will try to make up for the loss, and that’s really what’s happening to people with disabilities.  It may be true that people with this abilities are more evolved spiritually than the average population but I truthfully don’t know for sure.  I believe it but I can’t prove it.  It’s much more accepted to believe that sensory deprivation in any form will lead to the remaining senses becoming heightened, including extrasensory ability.  So if you have people in your life who are disabled in any form, my advice is not to question them too much if they claim to have spiritual experiences.  They’re probably telling the truth.

What are your theories?

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