When your psychic abilities fail

Pills This has been the dilemma in my life for so many years that it’s gotten to be a running joke in my family. I used to care but I take a pill for that now.

Most of you have probably noticed an absence of blogs and good information on reincarnation or psychic abilities from me in the last year. The explanation is quite simple: my personal abilities and barriers have been continuously failing since a few of my medications were changed last year. I was taking several things that don’t need to be named (not everyone needs to know about every health problem I have) but two of them were for chronic vertigo and also a drug for anxiety and depression. Last year, my insurance stopped paying for my anxiety drug and I endured cold turkey withdrawals before my doctor found an alternative drug. I was off my medication for a few months and I sank to the bottom again. It got really bad and I don’t really want to talk about it in detail. Needless to say, I started a new drug that ended up working better than the old one but I was so bad off that we decided to double my dose. Add the doubled dose of an SSRI drug to taking something else for chronic vertigo and you have two drugs messing with my brain.

In other words, you mess with my brain and you mess with my intuitive abilities. You mess with my intuitive abilities and you mess with my ability to keep up protective barriers around myself and my home.

Jessica Jewett

I first noticed things were off last spring when an inability to do readings became more and more consistent. It’s normal to have bad days where things just don’t click for the intuitive. It’s no big deal. If you come back to it in a day or two, it usually works just fine. But the bad days started outnumbering the good days to the point where I’d stare at a person and see nothing at all. For a lifelong intuitive, that’s frightening. It’s a loss of one of the senses that we always had, almost like going completely blind or deaf in just a couple of months. It’s a shock to the system. People depend on me to provide guidance and not having enough good days to keep up with the demand left me phobic of even touching my email. Roughly 10,000 emails accumulated in six months. I still haven’t gotten through all of it.

Simultaneously in this period, I noticed a blindness to my regular household spirit activity. Other people in my home went on noticing things like my mother, my grandmother, and my home health lady, but it was like I went virtually blind and deaf to it. Yet a few months ago, I had a dream about an inhuman helpful entity joining my household for protection because I’m clearly unable to do it myself. I did some research the next day and my best guess is that it’s something called a brownie. It was the night of November 23rd into the 24th.

brownie In the dream, I let a stray black cat into my house to feed him. The cat slowly turned into a little leprechaun-ish looking creature. He said every day he was going to come back and I was to leave him offerings of sweets. There were no threats though. It was just like you will do this thing. So I looked around because the dream was so vivid that it couldn’t have been just my brain spitting out things I’d seen that day. It seems I witnessed a brownie. It’s a household spirit legend of the Scottish and northern English peoples. They’re a kind of faerie, I think. They are said to live in unused portions of the house and help the homeowners with taking care of the home. They like gifts of sweets and if you call it a payment or misuse them, they’ll become offended and leave.

My English ancestry comes from the Midlands and northern England, so I found it interesting. If I did encounter a brownie – apparently showing themselves is rare – then maybe he was attracted to my ancestry. Or maybe I attracted him because I’m disabled and I often need help with looking after my household. I have no idea how he found me or why. It was so vivid that I could have done an illustration of how he looked. He was about three feet tall or so, fair haired (white?), exaggerated wide face, very large eyes, large wide nose, and a long smile like a troll doll. He had a blue jacket that was kind of faded and ratty, and tan trousers. He didn’t scare me at all. He looked scary but he wasn’t scary himself. In my dream state, it didn’t even startle me like this little guy was totally normal being let into my house.

Other than that, nothing much happened to me since my medication changed. It has hurt me emotionally and mentally because I carry around a lot of guilt. People like me are not as common as one might think and I feel like such a failure if I’m not able to help as much as I have in the past. My choice appears to be good mental and physical health through medication or excellent intuitive abilities but severe anxiety, depression, and bad physical health without medication. Do I sacrifice myself for others or do I take care of myself and hope this problem reroutes itself around the medicated brain? You see why I feel guilty and like a failure this past year. I wouldn’t be having these problems if I could keep my health under control – as if I could control that!

Daisy, Beagle There’s a problem with all of this though. It appears that the barriers around myself and my home to keep out unwanted entities or energies are not working like they should because nothing else in me is working right now. That’s why I’m writing this blog and trying to figure out what to do. I don’t feel safe in my home at night lately. Night before last, my dog was being rather fidgety and my cats were suddenly being rather violent toward one another. I didn’t think anything of it at first until my dog broke open the door and ran upstairs, which is something she’s never done in the past. She refused to come back to bed with me and instead slept with my mother. I settled down again and, while lying on my back, I heard whispering between two things around me. It was so clear, yet so secretive that I couldn’t make out any words. I know my normal reactions and the fear I felt wasn’t normal. I felt threatened. I felt dread.

Last night, the whispering turned into a louder voice. I got grabbed. It yanked my foot like it was trying to pull me off the bed. I thought it was my granny and I turned around to tell her to stop but nothing was there. My regulars know not to bother my feet because it hurts me a lot. This is not one of my regulars. Today, my dog still refuses to spend much time in this room with me. That’s the pattern. Right before something bad happens, my dog runs and breaks open doors to get away.

I’m so used to explaining to other people how to deal with unwanted entities. I’m unnerved that I have one because I thought my barriers were pretty solid. This is another symptom of a bigger problem. My abilities and barriers have been failing for almost a year. I’m so out of sorts. I’m sure some of you have noticed.

I have been reading about other intuitives, mediums, and psychics who lose their abilities after taking certain medications and I truthfully want to cry sometimes. I have to start over like redoing 32 years of work. There’s no other way to get it back without stopping the medication. Not to be morbid but stopping medication for me leads to suicidal tendencies within six months. I can’t do that. I thought it would reroute and come back on its own but it’s been almost a year with just an occasional trickle coming through. It’s not going to come back on its own with the combination of medications I take. I have to train myself like I’m my own student, it seems.

I’m terrified but this phase of my life must be happening for a reason.

11 responses to “When your psychic abilities fail”

  1. Elina says:

    I’m not an intuitive like you but I can still feel your pain and imagine what you are going through.

    I believe everything does happen for a reason. Stay strong and never lose hope. You have the power to take back control of your life. It will get better. I believe in you Jess.

  2. Donna says:

    We actually make a business of selling guardian servitors – created spirits/thought forms for protection. It sounds as though this would be exactly what you need (and we have some that are very inexpensive). We have guardians designed to shield and protect individuals, and some that are designed to protect households/properties, and automobiles. You can find them at http://www.eclipsemetaphysical.com

    A guardian can make shields for you at your command, and also engage in other protective actions. Most have a variety of other skills as well.

    I’ll be happy to answer any questions you might have about them, in detail. What you’re describing is not an uncommon problem.

  3. Joanie Moore says:

    So, I know what you are going through. All my life up until..10 years ago, I was able to see and hear spirits. I had been on some ssri’s but none had effected me like this one..but I also ended up having panic attacks and rage issues. Also, This new one, it just blocks EVERYTHING out. I get a glimpse once in a while, but I can’t see them like I want to..like I used to. That in itself depresses me more than my depression did. I know how you feel. I couldn’t do the reading thing, but I could pick up an item and tell you about the person, and get it pretty damn right on. I have people on both sides of my family going down years that have been intuitive and had no idea how much we are all alike. It’s nice to have family I can talk to about it. 🙂 I have had dreams of past lives (none yet of those you have mentioned, but the ones you mentioned seem so right it’s scary) and when I am with my best friend, my abilities seem even more sharp. Anyway, Praying, sending white light and hoping things sort themselves out. In my thoughts and meditations, they tell me that you need to sage and demand that the negative spirits leave the house, that they do not belong there and they are scaring the animals of the house. The spirits may have come in with the kitten, from the house it came from previously. Trying to take over the house and scare you out. Just my thoughts. In my research on Brownies, Brownies, in legend, live around human habitation. While they certainly aren’t animals — being sprites and in some cases allegedly ghosts they are very much a part of the human ecosystem.
    I think he found you because you were in need. Make sure you try to keep a white light around you the best you can and envision one around your pets and your house if you can. Hugs my friend.

  4. Emily says:

    Stay strong Jessica! Everything happens for a reason, even if it doesn’t feel like it at times. I know you have the courage to pull through this phase of your life and fight through these troubling times.

  5. Tracy says:

    Hello…sorry you are going through a tough time. I was wondering how you were going to handle readings that have been ordered and paid for through PayPal (over a month ago now) that are not able to be filled/emailed now? I have emailed a couple times and haven’t received a response. Hope you are feeling better.

  6. The matter with dreams, bad dreams or night terrors is because they are usually all purely relevant to the individual decryption it has for the particular individual experiencing the dream. Only two people may have a quite similar dream but convey different things with reference to each other. And that means you must keep a balanced view when examining the knowledge in the dream.

  7. Kristin says:

    Jessica, I would love to see you do a series of blog posts detailing the exercises you are doing to regain your abilities, and how those exercises could be adapted for people who are just starting to explore any abilities they might have.
    Personally, I think that I have had more “experiences” (one-off situations), than “abilities,” but I would love to know what I could do to make these more consistent, or to know how to better trust in these experiences when they do happen.

  8. Lynda says:

    Hi Jessica,
    Hope all goes well for you. I’m sending my prayers and positive energy your way.

  9. Ellie says:

    Unfortunately for me my abilities have developed over a period in my life in which I have not been medication free. I see a lot of things which are not there, hear people in empty rooms, frquently get white feathers on demand, often get pleasant scents wafting with no explanation of a source.

    Whilst I have an excellent instinct in bursts, I wonder whether this has a detrimental affect on what could be an incredible gift. I’m always told I have the gift. To experience so much spiritual activity whilst medicated surely indicates a strong gift?

    I also love crystals, pendulums and tumble stones.

    Also I find nature helps these abilities. Like it recharges me. Clears all the stress out my head. The green recharges me.

    Ellie

  10. Susanne says:

    I wasn’t aware that your health troubles you so much when I ordered my readings. They are not urgent.

    This may not help with actual unwelcome spirits, but I found that multivitamins, especially B vitamins and anything that strengthens the nervous system, helped me greatly with my anxiety at night. I used to get anxious as soon as the sun started going down in the afternoon, but the vitamins took care of that. It could help with feeling more able to fend off whatever bothers you…
    It took a few months to fully kick in, but made it better gradually after just a few weeks.
    My brand is One per Day, they have everything except magnesium, which I add myself for balanced minerals.

    If somebody had told me ten years ago my problem could be solved by over the counter vitamins, I wouldn’t even have listened…

    Wishing you the best!
    Susanne

Leave a Reply to falling dreams Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Categories